Just when I know how to escalate and get good with women quickly, I think of those women I slept with but couldn’t keep around.

And it’s quite sad.

So many women had the potential to be great girlfriends.

But I had my brain up my butt.

… that may sounds a little harsh.

But this comes down from TWO distinct problems:

First, I tried to prove something to myself. I was still a recovering nerd. And I’ve never fully recovered. And stopped trying to recover. And that’s what’s made me move past this “proving myself” thing.

I’ve accepted what I am.

Sure, I like video games and comic books.

But…

Do you think girls have cooler interests?

Is Myspace, shopping and getting drunk any cooler than what I’m into?

It’s all have connection.

Self-acceptance is what really matters.

A woman won’t accept you if you don’t accept yourself.

Can you imagine a woman wanting to be your girlfriend when you don’t like yourself?

She will HATE your presence and don’t want to be around you.

Because you can’t really like a woman, if you don’t like yourself. And if you do like her, but not yourself, then you look like a total loser. And who do you think wants to date a loser?

It may sound easy, but self-acceptance is hard to do. How many times have you hear these from people “I don’t care what anyone thinks of me!”

Based on my experience, almost all DON’T ACCEPT themselves completely.

And I am one of them.

How you accept yourself is how women find you attractive, and people likes to be around you.

It can be really hard to accept yourself completely. The creep in old beliefs telling you, you are not enough, that you must be more than you are now.

The degree to which your game becomes better is if you know the degree to which you stop these thoughts.

Because being yourself and not doubting yourself is the game. And game doesn’t stop after your opener, after making love, after a few dates. It never stops.

Because that’s you.

You are not divided from your game.

Your game IS YOU. This game is the degree to which you can demonstrates who you are.

Maybe you think “But I’m nervous and insecure and awkward.” I don’t agree. That’s not you.

That is the indistinct you.

That is you trying to come out, but your ego, your old mental habits stop you from expressing what you really want to express.

Before I go deeper to that, I want to skip to the second reason why I couldn’t keep women around after I slept with them.

I’m not conscious about shaping.

And shaping is all about knowing what YOU want. If you don’t know what you want, you can’t shape. And knowing what you want is really just an extension of self-acceptance.

In fact, it’s self-acceptance, applied to others. You know what you like, and you encourage women to be that for you.

As you know, women are very flexible. They have many sides that they can reveal to a man. Guys usually tell women to be selfish, mean, and act like they are better than a guy.

But it’s not really her fault. She’s just doing what she’s told. Women are always looking to men to get a sense of reality.

So if you come to a woman and treat her like she’s on a pedestal, she will act accordingly.

If you approach her and treat her like she’s lucky you talked to her, she’ll feel that way.

Likewise, after mating, if you treat her like she should stay in your life and nurture your lifestyle, she will do so.

This was tackled deeper in our workshop. I’ve developed a lot of things to shape a woman to be EXACTLY the kind of woman I want in my life.

And women are different from each other. For example, I may want another woman to be a sugar mama! I may want one woman to be just a partner in bed. I may want another one to be a girlfriend. It all depends on what we want.

I remember all the crappy, frustrating relationships I used to have.

I remember all the hookups I had as a young pickup artist, and how frustrating it was to not see those women again.

But the moment I started to accept myself and finding out what I really wanted, it all came together.

The Attraction Code is all about figuring out who you are, accepting and cultivating your character, and then applying that to the women you want to meet, sleep with, and date.

If you’re struggling with self acceptance and letting the real YOU shine through The Attraction Code is a MUST HAVE.

Dating can be your best friend.

…OR your worst adversary.

Often, a guy can feel like a slave to his biological need to procreate.

Then there goes a common quote, “He thinks with his… You know.”

Well it can be tough to NOT think that way if you aren’t sensually satisfied.

But men are also goal oriented.

We need to achieve things and influence the world in a good way. And we are doers of it.

Balancing the two - my urges and achieving my goals is one of the biggest challenges I’ve personally faced.

When you are single, dating can consume a lot of time. Women will suck away at your time if you don’t know what you’re doing.

Before you know it, you are spending hours in the park, feeding the birds and cuddling… there’s nothing wrong with spending a quality time with your girlfriend, AS LONG AS YOU DON’T compromise YOUR GOALS IN LIFE.

Goals take time, likewise to women.

In fact, it’s the nature of a woman to take up the man’s time - it’s her way of getting you to invest in her. That way if the woman gets pregnant there’s a less chance of you leaving (this comes from our caveman days, so to speak).

Managing your time with women can get really tricky. You see, most guys WANT to give women their time. Men are by nature the “givers.” They like to please women, protect them, and give them good feelings.

Men also have a urges that can completely take over your thoughts.

Both of these things can get in the way of you making the most time of your life.

I want you to take a second and ask yourself, “WHAT DO I REALLY WANT TO GIVE TO WOMEN?”

Now I know it wasn’t about “money,” or “control over my life,” or “lots of my free time.”

It was probably something like “relaxation, excitement, feeling of safety, good feelings, sexual pleasure, make her smile or feel good about herself, etc.”

There are two ways that I think why men have problems with how they use their time with women.

First, they overcompensate with other stuff - like spending too much time or money on a woman because they think that the gifts they REALLY wanted to give aren’t that valuable.

Second, men think that they are “getting” something valuable when a woman spends her time with them.

Society brainwashes guys into believing that women are a prize to attain, and that there’s some inherent value in a pretty face.

It’s not TRUE!

Women are cute, sometimes fun, but ultimately not that important, AND THEY CAN’T COMPLETE YOUR LIFE! The best thing is see a women for what they are, nothing more, nothing less.

Now getting out of this mental prison of feeling inferior to women is really hard.

Your mental habits are subtle and hard to notice because you’ve been doing them for years.

Young men are taught that their urges is crude and silly, and that it is just a favor that women ALLOWS them to mate with them.

There’s a syndrome that I call a “doofus dad” syndromeThere’s another societal factor going on, . In almost every TV commercial and sitcom, the “dad” or “boyfriend” or “husband” is a dopey, incompetent goof, and the mom/daughter/girlfriend/wife has to use her superior intelligence to fix the situation.

This brings to an opinion that women are “better,” and that their time is more important than yours.

You will feel obligated to give a woman a LOT OF TIME if your time is not so valuable.

But here’s the thing - you won’t be present for most of that time, if you are giving a woman too much time. You will be distracted, resentful, you will give her your “half-assed” attention.

When I analyzed tons and tons of dates I went on women, it was just when I realized it.

After a while I started giving women smaller amounts of my time, but my FULL ATTENTION.

This makes our time better, and aside from that it created MASSIVE ATTRACTION because I left women obsess more.

Now my girlfriends can’t get enough of me - in fact, I don’t GIVE THEM “enough.”

You see, “enough” would mean, “overexposure” to me, and women can’t be pulled to what they already have.

I don’t recommend playing games with girls and you pretend to be busy or whatever. In reality, the proper way to manage your time is by being HONEST.

No need of games, just be real with the girl - and don’t spend more time that you want.

Focus on your personal goals, and enjoy whatever free time you have with women. Be a man on the go.

Now it requires that in a short span of time that you can be able to meet a lot of women, which I’ll have to take up in another newsletter.

It makes me sad to see men waste their lives chasing and “putting up with” women, and then they are buried in their coffin ALONE.

Remember that women aren’t property that you can keep or somehow bring with you when you die.

Investing all your time with a woman is not a guarantee that you can “keep” her.

I want to make one more point - when you start being honest about how much time you’re willing to give a woman, you may feel GUILTY.

It’s either a girl will try to make you feel guilty, or you will feel it on your own. This is ok, it just means you have a weak focus.

You see, if you are following your true path, it will usually stray from the social norm.

If you are in the habit of adopting the values that others try to impose onto you, you will probably experience some tension, guilt, discomfort, even loneliness at first.

That’s why I set and develop the Attraction Code. It’s all about self-control, finding true path, and letting the real ‘you’ emerge from within.

And no, we don’t try to impose our values or goals onto you. We think you’ll be able to do that for yourself, given the proper guidance.

Vin

If you are interested in meeting, attracting and keeping a “10″, then you should read this letter.

But before anything else, let’s go waaaay back…

It was in my high school, that there was a girl in my class who was seems so perfect.

She was intelligent, cool, and so beautiful that it was hard to look at her (and yet I couldn’t stop my eyes looking)…

She was one of the popular kids, but was friendly to everyone.

We talked occasionally, and looking back I realize we were flirting (I was too stupid to realize at the time).

I wanted to ask her to senior prom so badly…but I chickened out at the last minute.

A few years later I realized she had a crush on me all senior year.

I have talked to lot of men and this seems a common experience to them. they missed an opportunity to meet this ONE SPECIAL WOMAN who you crushed on from afar, or the girl had broke their heart…

Ah, the elusive “10,” the perfect girl that every guy wants but never seems to attain.

I have a lot to say about so-called “10’s.” In one sense they are another “breed” of woman, but at the same time, it’s that kind of thinking that makes them so.

Understanding your own fascination with female perfection, and understanding the reality of extremely beautiful women will help you resolve this conundrum, and maybe help you find that “perfect girl” for yourself.

First of all, the concept of a “10″ is a myth. There is no such thing as a perfect human being. No woman is more “valuable” just because she looks nicer than other women.

The only true “10″ is the one that’s perfect for you, a woman that turns you on, whom you have great chemistry with.

The world is full of 10’s, you just need to have the skills and ability to approach a lot of women and make an options for yourself.

It will be a failure on your part if you treat women differently just basing solely on looks or on whose much prettier.

Why?

Because almost all men do that.

The girl knows what you are about and she sees you as a shallow guy.

But there definitely are certain women that seem on another “level” of beauty than the rest. These women get treated much differently than other women.

You need to understand on how you will deal with these kinds of women.

As what I’ve said, you shouldn’t treat women “differently.”

Let me clear this up.

You shouldn’t treat a woman BETTER than the other women. But there are things that you need to know.

First, she don’t like a guy that chases her for her looks alone.

A woman wants to be appreciated for her personality above anything else.

Now for your own sake I’m going to give you a heads up.

There are two types of “10’s.”

High self esteem, and low self-esteem.

Low self esteem 10’s are pretty common. They are used to being wanted for their looks, but they know that they didn’t EARN that attention, so they have a guilt complex.

In fact, they are in complete dumbasses or most probably their lives have been coasted.

It may sounds not good but I call it like it is.

These women take away their validation will make them flip out and do anything to get it back. They also respond to jerk-behavior.

Anything.

(Aside from it, these women usually suck in bed and when you get involved with them, they are in total head cases.)

Meanwhile, the high self-esteem 10’s are women that have had a taste of the elite - early from the start they realized that high levels of society were attainable to them, they exert an effort be intelligent, successful and make the most of their lives.

These women know that they are just a little closer to a great life than everyone else, and so they are motivated to put in the extra effort.

Usually HSE 10’s are intellegent, have good attitudes, have a direction in life and have lots of interests beyond being clubbing.

In fact, most of beautiful women I’ve dated didn’t go to the club. They just spend their nights being with their families, reading, or having a nice dinner with friends (or studying if they were in college).

And here’s another interesting thing. These women are single for long periods of time while in-between boyfriends. Why?

The women here have a high standards for themselves, and this makes most guys either too intimidated to approached and ask them out, or act too needy and pathetic around them, it’s seldom they meet another man who is at the same level with them.

But here’s the good news. You will find these women the easiest to attract when you understand The Attraction Code.

Being the best man you can be and being a “male 10″ is what you will get from these Attraction Code.

You’ll notice an interesting thing when you start to embody the Attraction Code.

You’ll get odd responses from less attractive women - they will occasionally be rude to you because they know they’re not on your level - it’s what I call the Auto-Rejection Mechanism. Some women will try to protect themselves from being rejected by you, by rejecting YOU first.

But you’ll be amazed to see the responds of the most beautiful and attractive women that warm right up to you as soon as you approach them - whether on the street or in the bar - because they can see that you are on their “level.”

The woman will thinks “finally, a guy who can hang with me; he’s confident and treats me like a real person. And he’s the only guy who’s actually tried to talk to me today, instead of whistling from his car.”

The Attraction Code is meant for these kinds of women. And of course you’ll have plenty of “adventures” to enjoy with all kinds of women, but this is about having the option of dating the hottest, highest quality women.

There are bunch of 10’s out there waiting for you.

Don’t spend another year missing something that you could’ve been enjoying right now.

Vin

Have you avoided having a conversation to a woman just because she was talking to another guy?

Or maybe you saw a group of girls with one or two guys with them and you ASSUMED the guys were cooler than you so you avoided approaching because you feared embarrassment.

There are a couple of reasons why most guys are too shy in approaching women who are with other guys.

They assume that the girl is “with” the guy, and assume he’s her boyfriend.

Guys shouldn’t think this as a barrier of talking to a woman. Plus - she’s not a guy’s “slave” or a piece of property, so she is free to talk to whomever she chooses, especially in a social situation like in the bar where people meet other people.

Approaching oftenly a woman who is “with” a guy can make you look more confident, and draw out the jealous side of the guy, making him look insecure and weak.

The second reason why guys don’t approach woman who is “with” a guy points to a deep insecurity based on a simple misconception.

Guys assumed that the “other guy” is stronger, cooler, or somehow more powerful than they are. Men tend to be threatened by other men.

This exist in an ancient survival strategy that has been passed through human minds.

The social hierarchy is very subtle, and mostly unconscious, and it’s hard to tell who the more “dominant” person is in any given interaction. So when a male is confronted by another male, he doesn’t know how dominant the other guy is.

As was probably common thousands of years ago, a guy doesn’t know if he will be embarrassed verbally.

To assumed that the guy is a threat is the safest way to play. Because guys that are too bold may have won a few confrontations, but it will take them a single mistake that can end up their game.

And then their genes were eliminated from “race” so to speak.

So the guys who played it safe, and avoided confrontation usually lived long enough to reproduce and survive.

The irony is that nowadays this hard-wired survival strategy is the basis for most approach anxiety - men makes a false assumptions that will lead them to avoid approaching women unnecessarily.

The thing is, when you are in the bar or club and you see a woman talking to another guy, you would think she’s not WITH him.

Usually, they JUST MET!

For many instances I’ve approached a girl with a guy thinking it was her boyfriend, then only to find out that he was just a random dude who just approached her. Or he was just a friend or relative.

I think of all the times I completely avoided talking to a woman because I saw her with another guy. I regret having missed so many opportunities. Which brings me to my first point:

YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT HE MEANS TO HER. DON’T ASSUME THEY ARE TOGETHER UNTIL YOU SEE PHYSICAL EVIDENCE.

You will know it if you try to act and find out. Just remember that in time that they are together you should be alert an respectful, the guy may be the insecure jealous type and may start a confrontation.

So use your brain - just don’t be stagnant in making a false assumptions.

The idea that the other man can be more “dominant” that you are is the next important thing that I want to talk about.

The concept of the alpha male is completely outdated. In the caveman days, the alpha male had real power - he had access to resources like food, and was physically stronger, so he could beat up competitors.

But ask yourself if those same power are still existing today. Every man with a source of income can survive on his own - if you’re reading this, you probably have an access to your needs like food. You’re all set.

Plus, in this modern world it is irrelevant to use the physical strength just to beat people up. It’s illegal.

Attacking another person will always end you up defeated because the police always win.

If you think about it, you are LETTING RANDOM GUYS STOP YOU FOR NO REASON!

Just excuse my French, but who is HE to say who YOU talk to???

It was annoying - remembering all the girls I missed out on because I was scare about some DUDE. And I get mad knowing that the other guys are dealing with some crap!

When you’re on your deathbed, you are going to look back on all the things you did and didn’t do. How painful would it be to say “I didn’t meet that girl because I was scared of another guy,” or “there were so many beautiful women I could’ve enjoyed, but I didn’t even try because I saw them TALKING to another guy.”

I don’t want to happen that to you.

So let’s analyze it deeply. You truly don’t understand dominance if you are seeing the other guy as more dominant.

You see, if you’re concerned with who is more dominant you instantly make yourself NOT dominant. There’s a better focus.

You must first THINK like a dominant man in order to become dominant. And dominant men doesn’t care who is more dominant. So what do dominant men think about? Whatever it is that they are doing or want.

So when you see another guy talking to a group of girls. Focus on the girls instead of worrying who is the dominant between the two of you.

I seldom even acknowledge other guys, because it’s proven to be just a waste of time. 9 out of 10 women don’t even know the guy - they just meet him.

Or if they do, maybe ONE of the girls know him, and barely the rest know him.

Normally, seldom for women to go out with a guy they are dating, more often they would like to bring with them a guy that is more of a protector/friend because a guy like that is more valuable when they go out on the town.

And also, if that guy IS with one of the girls, that means he’s NOT with the other girls - they are fair game.

When you are concerned with who’s the alpha male, you are by definition NOT the alpha male. In fact, it’s questionable whether alpha males truly exist in the modern world.

Have your focus in a USEFUL place and don’t assume anything. And don’t let some random guy prevent you from enjoying YOUR LIFE!

There are three reasons for this.

First, being socially proactive may be new to you.

I remember the first time I started weight lifting, I don’t have an upper pectoral muscles - the muscle right at the top of your chest just under your clavicle that make your chest look big.

Actually I did, but they were so small and weak, it took a good three weeks to even begin to feel them. Every time I worked them out I was incredibly sore and could barely move my arms.

Then I can now handle the big amounts of weight right after I have reached the tripping point in the development of my muscle. The mind is in that way too.

It takes time to develop these new neuro-pathways on your own. If you’re not pushing yourself HARD day in-day out, it can take awhile, depending on your skill level.

The second reason that can cause a feeling of social fatigue is that when you think that there is too much to do or learn when meeting women.

This is actually a little different from “fatigue.” It’s more like feeling overwhelmed.

One way that can frazzle your mind is when you are overwhelmed by something. And this can lead to some sort of discouragement, exhaustion and depression. It’s like your body saying “Whew, enough for this much work, I’m quitting before I can even begin”

This will hinder you from doing any progress. I was in this situation when I was putting a lot of theories on my notes. And as I looked at them I’ve seen that I am just like looking for a huge and complex physics equation.

It was daunting to think that I had to DO all this stuff just to have quality women in my life.

The last reason for feeling exhausted in the dating and mating game is that you are spending too much mental energy in the wrong places, wasting your focus on stuff that isn’t useful to pickup.

99 percent of men gets it wrong when it comes to attracting women. The thing is, the woman usually can’t tell, because most men after suffering from a few harsh rejections learn to hide their inner “stuff.”

But this doesn’t deny the truth that when the average guy is attracted to a woman, he exerts his effort and mental energy on trying to impress the woman, or figure out if she likes him.

Think about the messages we get from the media, our parents and friends, and women - it’s the man’s role to IMPRESS the woman and EARN “getting in bed” from her.

So Pathetic!

I get so mad when I see some commercial with a guy bumbling around trying to impress some cute girl, and looking like a fool while she giggles like she’s better than him because she’s a girl.

So much for that… what I’m trying to imply here is that when it comes to the matter of controlling a date, guys are being screwed.

But if a guy takes the time to adjust the way his MIND works when it comes to attraction, it changes everything.

You need to get the most out of your body and mind so that it can lead you to the highest level of your interaction with women and that’s what’s really attractive.

A GUY AT HIS BEST.

Does meeting with women seems like a WORK to you?

And do you ever feel despite all your hard work you’re not even closer to your goal?

If you agreed to those questions, then you may continue reading.

In fact, dating game can be quite frustrating.

You see a girl you like, but she has a boyfriend.

You think everything is going great with a girl and she stops returning your calls.

Not to mention the fact that as the man you pretty much have to do everything to move things forward.

YOU have to have the courage to approach.

At first, you have to keep the conversation moving, you have to escalate physically, you have to get her number and you have to have a logistical way to take her home, YOU have to set a date.

You know what, the standards for men’s behavior are much higher than women.

(Don’t get me started on that…let’s just say women are allowed to get away with sub-par behavior just because they are “pretty.”)

That can be debilitating, especially if you don’t have an “extroverted” trait.

… I have encountered a client that has a problem of “extroversion fatigue.”

I exactly knew what he meant about because I used to struggle with it before.

Before I began to teach myself pickup, I would go out, and be mentally DRAINED after talking to three or four women.

What I do is to have a sit and rest!

I am working hard than I was in my full time job instead of having some fun and relax in those situation. Now you see how strange it is.

I’d go home and be absolutely DEAD

… from TALKING TO WOMEN!

That things makes any sense???

As a whole, there is a general dating fatigue. Having a discouraging results, an emotional ups and downs with regards to the hard work and effort that I make just to have a girl to hang out with me or to sleep with me.

It is just like I am having an overtime in my full-time job!

The first time I got into this game I had force myself to go out and pickup ALL DAY for days on end. (I was a nerd, I admit that, and had pushed it to the extreme.)

All I can say is that I have this passion in learning those stuff (very eager for the outcome after years of sensual frustration)

I would push myself like professional athletes push themselves in the gym.

I was working muscles I had never used before, or to be more precise, I was forming NEW NEUROPATHWAYS.

If you can relate to any of this, then you are probably working too hard in your interactions with women.

There’s one thing you need to know when going for a one-night stand - You cannot always bring home the hottest girl in the place.

You can get a solid number from her, but its not a guarantee that you can take her home because whether or not a woman is open to going home with a guy, it varies widely in particular night.

However, there are LOTS of horny women moving around the clubs and bar anytime of the day that are open in getting lay that same day or night. And all you have to do is have a knowledge and ability to spot them.

I look for a few things - first, I notice how they are dressed, how much makeup they have on, etc. If they look like they put a lot of work in to being pretty, it was for a reason.

The reason is they want to be approached. Although it isn’t always true but is generally the case.

I also look for women who are being loud and animated. They are subconsciously looking for attention from men.

And the last thing that I look for, are women that are all standing and scoping around the room with blank expressions. Also those women that is looking around the room more often than the other girls in their group.

These are what women do in order for someone to notice and approach them.

Now you have to take this in mind — Avoid running your clever routines into full-stream and your cocky frame control stuff when approaching those women.

A simple “hey, you guys look great tonight. Special occasion?” is enough. It’s just have to be social, delicate and showing that you are interested in meeting them.

You should not openly discuss to the woman that you are looking to take her home and get her into bed. Because, if you talk about that, you’re putting a woman to a point where is to agree to implicitly bang with you.

Rather you want to build sensual tension, as we discuss heavily in our workshops.

This will be against a woman’s “rules” and she’ll definitely be keeping distance from you. And you really need a logistic information to know how you can get her back to your place.

So before that thing happen, you have to remove some of your overt sensual intention and try not to let her know that you are trying to pick her up.

You must have the willingness to control the situation and knows how to enjoy while having the escalation in the right way.

This is how it will works although it may sound that counter intuitive.

You must trust that women wants to be in bed and there are a lot of women in the club, bar or in any venue that wants to get a same day lay.

Some won’t and some will, and that is why you need to know how to spot and get them.

You don’t want to invest a bunch of time with the wrong girl, or worse, to pick the RIGHT girl, and then mess it up after a lengthy interaction.

That’s a HUGE waste of time.